I am once again on another flight back home. I have been so exhausted these past couple of months from having to travel every weekend and I was all too familiar with all the airport/airplane rules and safety guides. Once I hopped into my seat, I must have dozed off immediately because the next thing I remember happening was the flight attendant thanking us for flying American airlines since we had just landed. I open my eyes properly to start gathering my stuff and turn to look around and I see this guy just looking at me. I fake a smile and look away and respond to the text from my friend who was picking me up.
Lolade called me 2 days after that plane ride and we have been inseparable. He was the perfect man for me; he understood me and was everything I wanted in a man.
6 months after we met and 4 months after we had been in an official relationship, I found out I was pregnant and I was ecstatic. I was going to be having a child for the love of my life and we were getting married anyways so why not start early. My mother won’t be happy but she loves him as well so she’d eventually come around.
I told Lolade that I was pregnant and he was so happy, how could he not be? What was there to not be happy about? He said “I cannot wait for you to give birth to our beautiful baby”. I was happier, this was a dream come true.
“I lost my job babe” this was Lolade; he got fired from work because they were downsizing. This is what he told me, he was devastated and I was sad to see my love in this state. “We can’t have a baby when I don’t have an income” he pleaded. “Please let’s abort it, I want to take care of you and my child, not the other way around. Please shola understand what I am saying” I aborted the baby.
2 months later, I get pregnant again; he has a job now so there’s nothing to worry about. “Who were you talking to at the party last night” last thing I heard before I woke up in the pool of my own blood in pain. He had beaten me last night, I don’t remember why but it was the first time it had happened. I just won’t talk to guys any more so I don’t upset him anymore. But once again, another pregnancy gone.
Third pregnancy, why am I stupid enough to make these mistakes. He won’t use a condom and I allow it. “We can’t have a baby now; you have to understand where I’m coming from.” “No, I am not aborting this baby and I will not understand this time.” I had never raised my voice but I was not going to abort this child and that was it. He left obviously because he was angry and I did not follow him, he always comes back calmer. He loves me so maybe when the baby is born he will come around.
That conversation was the last conversation I had with Lolade. My baby just celebrated her 5th birthday yesterday.
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